Tomatoes Again

I am sure you've been dying to know how my whole tomato saga turned out.  I can confidently say:  SUCCESS!  Every seed I planted germinated and turned into a plant, most of which are close to 5 feet tall and longer if you included the tumbling vines.  There are still a lot yet to ripen but when it comes time to pick them all off, I'll have more tomatoes than I know what to do with.

I definitely think I made the right choice to grow mostly cherry-type tomatoes, and I think next summer I might grow sweet-variety cherries almost exclusively, with the exception of maybe one or two larger varieties to use on burgers and stuff.

My garage, full of tomatoes!  I grew those from SEEDS!  So crazy!  (They are in the garage because it froze overnight.)

I'm glad I love eating tomatoes because they are definitely the best produce to grow in my no-garden situation.  PS, those purply-brown tomatoes taste like you'd think they would - intensely tomatoey, almost smoky.  Umami to the max.

Shoes

Somehow I have acquired more pairs of shoes than you'd think I own.  What I mean by this is, I'm not very fashionable and I'm definitely not what you'd call a "shoe addict" and I'm pretty sure I only have 3 pairs of shoes that you'd classify as "heels", so if you know me you wouldn't expect me to own a lot of shoes.  Especially since I only wear about 4 pairs regularly.

I think the main reason I have amassed such a large shoe collection is that I seem to usually buy pretty good quality shoes that never wear out.  For example, I still wear a pair of Merrell hiking shoes that I got in grade 10.  Grade 10 people, if you want to know how old I am compared to a grade 10, I started grade 10 in 2000.  And yet these shoes have not worn out!  They are still totes comfortable!  How is this possible?  I wore them almost every day walking to university and through my last 2.5 years of high school.  And still wear them almost every day at work except in winter (I work at a very casual dressing office, I could get away with wearing sweats if I wanted to but I don't because that's super gross).

When I deliver training at work, I like to play an awesome icebreaker that my friend Sherri and I invented back in our science camp instructor days.  One thing I really hate about most icebreakers is that they put people on the spot right away before anyone knows anyone, so they are often more uncomfortable than team-building.  For example sometimes icebreakers consist of "find a partner you don't know, talk about your hopes and dreams for the future and innermost secrets, and then present them to the rest of the group, that consists of all grumpy old men who have worked here for 30 years except for you, Robyn".  Okay that is a slight exaggeration but actually not really.  So when I do icebreakers, as the instructor I like to put minimal pressure on the class and as much pressure as possible on me.  With that long-winded introduction, the game is I come up with 10 totally random questions about myself that people who don't know me (or possibly even people who know me) would never know the answer to but have to guess the answers and then the winner gets a prize.  Kids LOVED it and I have found that adults, even the grumpiest of old men, also love it.  Best icebreaker ever, use it, you're welcome.

ANYWAY so one of the questions in that game is always "how old are these shoes?" and then I give a few options like 2 years, 5 years, 10 years.  I decided to maybe retire my beloved Merrells after someone creepily answered "they are 10 years old because the soles are worn out but you don't drag your feet."  It was very observant and something I had not noticed before.

I also kept a pair of Nike sport sandals from grade 5 all the way through high school and slightly into university until they just got so ugly that I threw them out.  They were still perfectly comfortable actually.  I'm also currently trying to wean myself off of a pair of leather clog-type shoes I got in high school that again, are so comfortable and not too falling apart. 

I'm starting to run out of room for these shoes but I feel like buying 2-3 pairs of shoes a year is by no means excessive, except the new shoes I buy aren't usually replacements.  Or actually they are often meant to be replacements but I am just too attached to the old comfortable shoes.  And it's hard to break in new shoes to get to that awesome level of comfort when the old ones have had 10 years of shaping perfectly to my feet.  What can compete with that experience?

I think I might go throw some old gross shoes in the garbage now.  But not my Merrells just yet.

Poo Teen

Background:  a) I'm in Montreal b) Since my sister switched my mom's phone to T9, she duznt know how to spell out words letter by letter anymore.

Mom:  It has been so nice and warm here this week you will have some ripe tomatoes when you get here and corn too did you have poo teen there Haha

Line/Theme Park Etiquette

Are you going to a theme park sometime in your life?  How about somewhere that you might have to stand in a long line (e.g. not a grocery store)?  Listen up, people, this is an important post.  We returned from a trip to Disney World a few days ago and here are some tips on how to stand in a line and go to a theme park properly and courteously.

The Main Tip:

DON'T BUDGE!  Seriously, theme park lines move fast enough that it is not considered to be proper etiquette to have someone "hold your place" in line.  It's super annoying when people start pushing through the line ahead of you because the rest of their party is a few groups ahead.  Also annoying when kids would run ahead in the line and the parents would be like "hey wait for us you dumb kids" and push ahead of everyone else.

What are you to do in a situation where the rest of your party somehow gets ahead of you in line?  The people in the front WAIT for the people in the back by allowing the parties in between to go ahead until the rest of the group catches up.  This does not disrupt the order of the line by adding any extra people in front of the in-between parties.

It was interesting how many people did not understand this courtesy.  One day we saw two or three families who were together but with one half of the group about five or six parties ahead in the line.  The front family kept telling the back family to come catch up with them but the back family didn't want to budge through the crowd with their strollers and children, so the front family said "Okay we'll just let them know you're with us when we get to the front of the line" thinking that the Disney employees would be like "oh of course, please bring your party of 8 from the back of the line up here now that you're at the front" but ha, when they got to the front of the line and said they were a party of 13 but the remaining 8 people were a ways back in line, Disney said "okay you can wait here until they catch up."  pwned amiright

I probably sound way more worked up about this than I actually ever was, like I didn't get angry every time someone pushed ahead of me because it wasn't constantly happening but I just wanted to share this general courtesy tip.

Other Tips and Stray Observations:

If you think your children are being annoying in the line and you try to "apologize" to other line-standers by constantly disciplining your kids (or just telling them to stop it over and over), guess who is being more annoying?  You, that's who.  Chances are if people are at Disney they probably are expecting that there will be some rowdy kids in the line.  You aren't making the situation better by whining at your kids to stop whining or yelling at them for calling Disney World Universal Studios or telling them to stop fidgeting over and over and over.  Having said that, if your kids are beating each other up and whacking other people in the process, make them stop.  Probably the easiest way would be to send them back to the hotel.

Also - if your kids are too bratty or lazy to handle going to a theme park, should you take them to said theme park???  NO, you should not.  How much fun are you going to have pushing your 12 year old around Disney World in a stroller that costs 20 bucks a day or more to rent?  (This is a true thing we saw.)  How much fun are you going to have if your kids are being brats the entire time but you don't want to "waste" your park passes by grounding the kids at the hotel for a day so they behave?  Kids should earn a fun vacation by not being jerks, otherwise it is simply not going to be a fun vacation.

My last observation was one I was aware of in media and stuff before going, but witnessed on several occasions as well, and it is something that annoys me.  That's the stereotype with Disney vacations that a) the moms micromanage and plan the vacation b) the dads hate Disney vacations and act as the "cool" parent who goes on all the "fun" rides while the mom sits with the kid who is too short to ride.  One of the moments that annoyed me most on the trip was a family of a mom, dad, and two boys got onto the Star Tours ride and the dad's seatbelt didn't buckle so the Disney employee told them they would have to get off the ride and get on the next one.  The kids looked really disappointed (it WAS going to be another 2 minute wait) so the mom just got off the ride so the dad and the kids could have fun and not have to wait for the next one.  I was so annoyed.  How about use your vacation to teach your kids some patience and not that Dad is fun and Mom is lame and will sacrifice her own fun for the kids and Dad.

Anyway, fun trip though!  Probably a few non-ranty posts about it to come.

Oh yeah the last tip:  calling your small children "stupid f--king kids" in front of everyone in the airport because they are excited to go to Disney and can't sit still makes you look like a massive jerk, not a cool dad.

How Sarah Learned to Make a Fire

This post is dedicated to Sarah.  Sarah and I worked together one summer and she has been a faithful blog reader since the beginning so I think she deserves a dedication post.  Why, because this blog appreciates its fans.  If you are a fan and want a dedication post similar to this one let me know.

Sarah grew up in Ottawa and I grew up in Saskatchewan, but I did not realize how different those two growing ups were until I met her.  We were at a staff retreat, sitting by an empty fire pit, while the rest of the staff went on a hike, when I learned that Sarah had never made a fire before.  "What do you do when you go camping?" I asked.  "HAHA camping??????" she replied.  Oh.  I see.

So I decided to teach Sarah how to make a fire.  It was going to be the perfect fire.  We set to work making the "teepee" - a cone-shape of thin logs around a pile of kindling.  It was the perfect teepee.  Now, to light it...

At which point we discovered we had no matches.  We scoured the retreat centre kitchen for a BBQ lighter, anything that might start a fire.  Nothing.  Now what?  We had stayed behind on the hike with the intention that when the rest of the staff returned, there would be a blazing inferno, ready for s'mores and hot dogs.  We couldn't disappoint.

One of us, possibly Jen, another co-worker who had stayed back from the hike, had a brainwave.  The cigarette lighters in the vehicles we brought!  Perfect.  Except, it was 2009, and all of our vehicles were brand-new rental vans, and in 2009 I guess they don't make cigarette lighters in vehicles anymore, probably because kids might burn themselves or something, stupid kids.  So anyway those stupid kids ruined that idea.

After more deliberation and half-heartedly trying to rub sticks together (who can actually do that, I am pretty sure it's an urban legend) someone realized that we had access to a couple of gas-powered barbeques.  If only there was some way to get the fire from the BBQ over to our perfect teepee...

This problem was solved with a turkey roaster.

I'll explain, if you can't connect those dots.  I probably shouldn't be advertising that we did this since it is somewhat stupid and dangerous but hey, we needed to get that fire started.  We were being resourceful.

We put a bunch of kindling in the turkey roaster and put a stick into the BBQ to light the end on fire.  Then we started a small fire in the roaster, carried it over to the fire pit, and used it to start our real fire.  At which point, the logs fell over and our perfect teepee was just a pile of logs and kindling, but it worked!  The staff did indeed return to an awesome campfire and Sarah has since put her fire-making skills to good use, and even gone camping last I heard.  And that is the story of how Sarah learned to start a fire, the dangerous and dumb way.

 Jen with the beginning of the fire - the fallen teepee and the smoldering roaster fire.

 Sarah, Jen and me with our amazing fire.

Reaping some rewards!

All my gardening work this summer - SO WORTH IT.

Margherita Pizza, Coors Light YOU ARE THE WORST, and a CUTE FOX!!!

Remember when I tried to make a delicious margherita pizza but it sucked?  So I was going to wait until the summer when I could use home-grown fresh tomatoes and basil to try again?  That day came, my friends.  Behold the glorious pizza:

It was a small pizza using a pita for the crust but still a pizza, using fresh picked basil and about half fresh picked tomatoes and half farmers' market tomatoes, which still count.  Maaaan there is nothing like a real tomato.  That one purple one sticks out quite prominently though which is sort of weird.  Very delicious though.


IN OTHER NEWS:

Yes, because that would be douchey like saying "beer me" or something.

Ba dum bum CHINGGG

PS, now is not the time for a rant about Coors Light ads, but if it was, I would talk about how much I hate them and how sexist their ads are.  The worst was "As cold as your girlfriend when she found out about your other girlfriend" or something.  HAHAHA yeah because it is totes manly and super cool to cheat and/or keep secrets from your partner yayy yay Coors Light jokes about it so it must be not that uncommon therefore it is okay for men to engage in this behaviour ohhhhh I hate you so much Coors Light!  Why are you such a bunch of douchebags.  Please go out of business.

IN EVEN OTHER NEWS:

This is a cute fox I saw at work.

He had two other friends who were all hanging around so I was like "I need to take pictures of cute foxes!!" so I went and started snapping away thinking, everyone is going to think I'm a big girly loser for taking millions of pictures of cute puppy-like animals, but then I turned around and everyone sheepishly had their cameras out as well and the miners were all making kissy noises to try and get the foxes to come closer.

Bernard's cheaper older brother?

I saw this at work.  Who the frig is Barry Callebaut and is he any relation to Bernard, or just trying to rip off his good name?

A String of Texts from My Mom

I went back to my room after showering one night at work last week to find these on my phone:

>What temp is it there ally drove to green water them coming back here for heather wedding tomorrow them fly to van sunday yikes meg need
>Need food but have not a car she could walk i guess i wolf her up when i phoned at seven she didnt know what day it was thought it was morm
>Morning at seven and she had to get ready for work she funny must have been a deep sleep Haha

Updates on my sisters' lives, courtesy of my mom's excellent texting skills.

The Best Hamburgers

If you actually like my posts about cooking you will like this one.  If you don't really care about my posts about cooking, you should still pay attention because this is one of the best recipes I have ever invented.

I'm always trying to make the perfect burger.  I've dabbled in turkey burgers and veggie burgers, both of which have turned out quite delicious in their own right, however as proven in the Parks and Recreation burger cookoff episode it's pretty tough to actually beat a good old fashioned beef patty, no matter how you dress up its competitor.

I've been inspired to try to make a healthier hamburger since learning of a Weight Watchers burger recipe that includes more chopped veggies and mushrooms than actual meat, yet still tastes amazing, so I rarely make a straight meat burger anymore because what do you have to lose by adding healthy ingredients without sacrificing flavour?

One of the problems with hamburgers though is that some of the best toppings (cheese, mushrooms, fried onions, and bacon) are hard to distribute evenly.  For example, how many of us have put bacon on a burger only to accidentally pull out an entire strip on the first bite?  Or have the cheese and other toppings get pushed out to the edges of the bun so that the middle of the burger is very weak in toppings?  I'm happy to report that last night I successfully used the Weight Watchers vegetable technique to solve some of these problems.

With that, here is my recipe for possibly the best hamburger I've ever had.  Not 100% healthy but with a ratio of approximately 1:1 "bad" stuff to "good" stuff, it's a lot better than ordering a Wendy's Baconator and tastes better too.

This recipe made 7 medium sized patties so it would probably be good for about 4 large patties.

Mix together (quantities are approximate):

1/2 cup grated smoked mozzarella
4 strips of cooked bacon (crumbled)
1/2-1 cup cooked couscous
1 egg
A few tbsp barbeque sauce
1-2 cups of finely chopped, cooked and drained of excess liquid mushrooms and onions
1-2 tbsp garlic powder (or include minced garlic with the mushrooms and onions)
1 lb extra lean ground beef (you're adding extra fat with the cheese and bacon so you don't have to worry about sacrificing juiciness by using the leanest beef)
1/2 tsp pepper
DO NOT add salt - there is enough of that from the cheese, bacon, and BBQ sauce and adding extra salt will make these too salty!

Form into patties and fry on medium-high heat for about 4 minutes per side or BBQ.

My only issue is that I haven't yet figured out the best technique for cooking burgers on the stove without slightly burning them - but in this case, the black that you see didn't taste burnt at all, it was just super caramelized so no problems there!

I topped it with more mushrooms and onions, pickles, lettuce, and tomato (no extra cheese needed) and ate it on a whole wheat bun.  While it may not be the healthiest recipe, the fact that only about 1/2 cup of cheese and 4 strips of bacon were needed to add awesome bacony cheesy flavour through the entire burger actually prevents you from topping it with more cheese and bacon, so it's unhealthy topping portion control.

The couscous was something I decided to try because I had some leftover couscous in my fridge, but what a great idea.  It's like adding breadcrumbs but better because it helps the burger retain moisture and is completely undetectable in the finished product, and adds some fibre too.  I don't think I'll ever omit it from burgers in the future.

Trust me, make these and enjoy one of the best burgers ever.